Things that I have pondered when I was trying to fall asleep.
Why do we put round pizza in a square box and eat it in triangles?
If camera lenses are round, why are the pictures square?
If Apple made a car, would it have windows?
Is a rivalry between two vegetarians still called a beef?
If Victoria has a secret, why does she reveal so much?
If you don't pay your exorcist do you get repossessed?
If I swallow magnets, will I become attractive?
It’s weird being the same age as old people.
Chocolate is God’s way of telling us he likes us a little bit chubby.
It’s probably my age that tricks people into thinking I’m an adult.
Never sing in the shower! Singing leads to dancing, dancing leads to slipping, and slipping leads to paramedics seeing you naked. So remember...Don’t sing!
I see people about my age mountain climbing; I feel good getting my leg through my underwear without losing my balance.
So if a cow doesn’t produce milk, is it a milk dud or an udder failure?
I don’t always go the extra mile, but when I do it’s because I missed my exit.
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