My wife and I had a little tiff a few weeks ago and I thought she overeacted a little bit. What I found interesting was how I reacted vs. how I would have in the past.
• Early in our marriage, I would have gotten upset at her. I would have felt accused and wronged. And my reaction would have made things worse.
• Later in our marriage, I would have realised that while I may have triggered what she did, her reaction was very much her issue as it was based on injuries from her past.
• This time I realised her past was a factor, but I went on to ask myself if I’d done something unloving or stupid that made it worse. (And I decided I had.)
This is what growing up looks like. (I just wish I’d gotten here decades sooner!)
